This past weekend, I was able to head East to Nashville with two ladies for #mamasnashbash30 – aka a friend’s 30th birthday. (Thanks Mr. Trotter for holding down the fort – you the real MVP!) We had the best time doing a whole lot of pre-mom stuff like … getting a full nights sleep + sleeping in, eating delicious meals while sitting down, finishing a full cup of coffee before it got cold, sitting in silence .. you know .. just the things we take for granted before kiddos. Anyways.. we had the best time and made some really good memories .. most of them revolving around our time in the car with various Lyft drivers. Here’s the cliff notes version…
Lyft Driver #1
Think of Mrs. Doubtfire as a guy – aka Melvin. Nice guy but literally drove 40 miles an hour on the highway. He said he drove full time but I’m not sure how – since we navigated the entire ride. Now that I’m thinking about it, this ride should have been severely discounted since we did half the work!
Lyft Driver #2
Where’s Waldo lookalike – aka Joel. This dude was super into folk music and was a musician himself. Unsurprisingly, we found that many people in the music industry moonlight as Lyft drivers.
Lyft Driver #3
Mohammad. This fella was a little on the creepy side and had a car that smelled like dirty feet. He told us about how he’s only been in Nashville for 4 months and won a ‘lottery’ to be able to come to the United States. Who knew that was even a thing? I can’t remember what he said brought him to Nashville – but of all the places he could have picked – Nashville wouldn’t have been my first choice. At this point in our trip, we had made an agreement that if we ever felt uncomfortable in a ride, we would be dropped off around the corner from our Air B&B. Upon drop off (around the corner from our rental), Mohammad decided to depart at a turtles pace. Following the script, we walked up our neighbors drive and before we knew it the neighbor sprinted out of his front door wondering what we were doing on his property. We ended up having to tell him about our creepy Lyft driver and how we didn’t want him to know where we were staying – so the most logical thing to do was to pretend we were staying somewhere else. Needless to say, the neighbor was happpppppy.
Lyft Driver #4
Noel. This one must have been our most normal trip because I can’t remember a thing about him.
Lyft Driver #5
Think Hermione Granger meets Maci from Teen Mom – aka Marion. This girl had just moved to Nashville to live with her cousin and had also just recently quit her ’80 hour a week’ job to become a full-time Lyft driver. Marion was also the kind of chick that only had one good girlfriend in each place she lived. I’m still so confused as to why everyone felt so open and comfortable with us. For most of these trips, I felt like the driver’s seat was the ‘therapist’s couch’ and we were the therapists.
Lyft Driver #6
Reed. Reed is a father of three (the princess stickers stuck to our hair gave that one away) and his wife is busy in real estate, while he’s working on getting his masters. Reed had the sweetest words to say about his wife – except about her parents. Supposedly, they are the type of grandparents that are inconvenienced at spending time with their grandkids, they don’t ever take all 3 of them at once and when the older girls go to their house the stick them in front of the TV or computer. When I hear of grandparents like this, it always drives me bonkers. How could they not want to soak up any time they are gifted with their grandbabes?!
Lyft Driver #7
Think Teller from Penn & Teller – aka Larry. This guy was pretty normal but he was fascinated by all the wealthy neighborhoods we drove through.
Lyft Driver #8
Tony – who drove a super nice Cadillac. Tony was a retired GM employee who moved from Detroit to Nashville. He gave us a very in-depth process of what happens on the automobile line. He now works for the Delta Sky Club where he serves some of the best breakfast you’ll find in an airport. His hours are from about 430a-noon and then he drives for Lyft most afternoons. He’s saving to take his girlfriend on a trip to either Havana or Aruba – which he will have to fly standby – but he can only count on one hand the number of times he hasn’t made it. The trick is to arrive for the earliest flights so you maximize your chance of getting on a flight throughout the day. See what I mean – they told us ALL the details.
Lyft Driver #9
Think Dennis Rader/BTK Killer – aka David. Oh David, I feel sorry for anyone that rides with you in your ‘baby’ – aka new Mercedes. You might need to have your license revoked and the cops called to your house for a drug raid. The first thing he said to us was that his previous rider asked if he was drunk. If that didn’t foreshadow how our ride was going to go, idk what would. This dude was seriously tripping on something. In our 10-minute car ride, he told us all about his fiance, the sound healing acupuncturist, who loves to use gongs in her practice. He told us he finally was doing something for himself after leaving his job in the oil field. Life lessons from David via the backseat of a Mercedes: #1) Look out for #1. #2) #1 = you and yours. #3) Stay safe and healthy. Well David, you made #3 hard to accomplish – our foot slammed on the imaginary brake more times than we could count. We were the first passengers of his that brought him into downtown Nashville and for that he was so thankful. He scanned through his CD player allowing us the privilege to listen to the first 3 seconds of every song but stopped long enough to let us know that his favorite song was high, high, high. Fitting. My favorite part though was when he mid-sentence got distracted by the horse behind us. Needless to say, we bailed at the first stop we could.
Lyft Driver #10
Andreas – pronounced ‘undress’. I can’t believe I’m about to type out this story – because how does this even happen? Andreas was an audio engineer that played his ‘beachy’ song for us = awful. 2 minutes into the ride, I asked him if he was driving his girlfriend’s car because I liked the decorations around his mirror (leis and pink stuff). He proceeded to tell us he was gay, and then he wasn’t gay, and then that he starred in a gay porno but not to worry it was a solo scene. Oh ya, and then he threw in there that he had 3 daughters – like that would help us believe he wasn’t gay – which he totally was – but we totally didn’t care either way. Remember, he spilled all of this in the first 2 minutes of us being in his car. At our request, he drove us to bar #1, one that he had never heard of before. Since he had never heard of it (meaning he thought he was a bar expert) he was going to stick around for a few minutes after dropping us off to make sure we decided we wanted to stay. Before we knew it, we found him strolling into bar #1 to hang out. Thankfully he stuck around though because we didn’t like the place so we left (and he wasn’t charging us for our rides compliments of the birthday girl). Upon drop off at bar #2, Andreas invites himself inside to hang out with us again. As we were at the bar ordering our first drink of the night, Andreas creeps up and orders himself one. Lyft driver + drinking = DUI = wayyy illegal. We then go and sit down and try everything in our power to get Andreas to head back out to work. We dropped the ‘we’re the boring mom’s card’ – and that we were going to finish our drink and head home. Thankfully, due to quick thinking, I told him we needed to go to the bathroom and then we followed the exit signs out the back. The bouncer wasn’t going to let us leave, but after we told him a quick version of how our Lyft driver followed us inside, had a drink and then wanted to drive us home, he let us make our escape. Only in Nashville people.
Lyft Driver #11
Our savior – aka Davone. After dipping out the back of Losers, we ran up the block and waved down Davone, our savior. He was an IT director, whose wife stayed home and his kid just got a full ride to UT on an academic scholarship (smarty got a 36 on his ACT.) I tried to talk him into moving to Kansas because we have an opening in our group for an IT Director, but he wasn’t feeling it. I’m not sure he had even heard of Kansas before.
Lyft Driver #12
Misty. Misty moved from Ohio to Nashville to pursue a career in marketing for the music industry. This ride was short and sweet so we were only able to skim the surface of her life before we were dropped off at our destination.
Lyft Driver #13
Hossam. Hossam had the dirtiest back seat I’ve ever seen (second to my own), and I know he was judging us the entire time he drove us from the local coffee shop (that had no open seating) to the closest Starbucks (tried and true). He didn’t talk – which after 12 drivers who did – I found comforting.
Lyft Driver #14
Think gamer who plays all night in their mom’s basement – aka Josh. I know I’m probably going to hell for this, but Josh’s car smelt like dirty panis (if you’re unsure of what that is – check here). Not that I’ve actually had experience smelling panis, this is just how I imagine it. Now that I think about it, it might have been his gauges that were causing the smell – but either way – it was so disgusting. I can’t even remember this ride because I was so focused on not throwing up.
Lyft Driver #15
Troy. Troy drove a nice, navy Audi QX80 (CT – next car maybe?) and immediately upon our entry into the vehicle, he asked us to make sure we didn’t make a mess. I’m not sure if he thought we were in Nashville celebrating our 3rd birthday or 30th. He thought of himself as ‘the best driver he’s ever known’ and was currently driving full-time for Lyft and Uber. These drivers must make some good money if he was able to afford that vehicle and afford to drive it all over Nashville every day. I’m sure his gas bill is outrageous. Maybe I need to quit my day job and take up driving for Uber/Lyft? Anyways, Troy gave us a ride home and then gave us his card so we could call him when we needed to be taken back to the airport. The airport was on his way home – so it worked out perfect since he had father/daughter dance to attend that night.
Phew! I can’t believe I remembered all those details. Needless to say, it was an interesting few days of rides. I couldn’t have made this stuff up if I tried! Do you have any crazy Lyft/Uber stories?? If so, I’d love to hear!
PS – this post isn’t sponsored by Lyft but we did find out that their prices were always cheaper than Uber and they give out a couple coupons for $5 off your first few rides if you’re a new customer. PSS – of all the vehicles I’ve ridden in with both Uber and Lyft drivers – Lyft drivers seem to have nicer vehicles. If you don’t get stuck with someone creepy – Lyft might be the way to go!